Nothing's More Manly
by The Notorious Cat
Summary: -Sequal To A Stokes Sweatshirt- Sara had more problems than she let on. When Nick finds out how serious they are, can he help Sara get through it? Will some romantic feelings develop? Nick-Sara --ONE SHOT--


- Sara's Point Of View -  
  
My eyes opened slowly as my impeccable inner alarm clock went off. The first thing I saw was the ceiling. Not my ceiling either. I was about to freak out when I realized that the first thing I smelled was the masculine smell that could only be matched to one man, Nock Stokes. And, true to his scent, there he lay, faithfully beside me. Well, all crises solved, I told myself. Good work Sidle.  
  
And then the next crisis hit.  
  
One of Nick's hands was innocently wrapped around my waist, and that was alright. But that wasn't what I was worried about. Nick's other hand was unconsciously low, and I mean low. Like, nearly between my legs low. I guess that might not seem like a big deal to some people, but Nick and I weren't even dating!  
  
Nick was still asleep, so I weighed my options. I guess, when I thought about it, it wasn't really that bad. When I gave it a moment and let the initial shock recede, it felt...right. So I decided to do nothing, just wait and see what Nick would do when he woke up.  
  
ONE HOUR LATER  
  
Nick obviously does not have an inner alarm clock. It was nearly an hour before he began to stir. I feigned sleep as his eyes opened. He let out a content sigh, hugging me to him with the hand around my waist. I waited for the right moment, formulating what I would say to him when I woke.  
  
He had noticed his other hand. His thumb moved, and the little sensors "down there" picked it up, and it tickled me slightly, causing me to jump. I had found the perfect opportunity.  
  
I jumped right off of my pillow, surprising him. My eyes opened with a start, and I exaggerated the wide-eyed look in my eyes, for effect. Then I relaxed, smiling at him, my fingertips gracing his chest for just a moment.  
  
"Sara, what was it?" he asked, concern in his expression. I smiled at him, my hand touching his chest. Then, like the last puzzle piece, the perfect explanation popped into my head.  
  
"Nothing. A bad dream. You know, the whole Susana Kirkwood case I told you about last night, well she was raped before she was killed. I had to take her to the hospital for the 'next morning pill'. And in the dream, the killer was advancing on me..." I trailed off, startling myself when a real tear rolled down my cheek.  
  
"I'm sorry..." he said, removing the hand we had both been acutely aware of a minute ago, but I caught it in mid-air. He looked at me, and I gave him a watery smile. I placed his hand on my hip, and turned my whole body towards him, snaking my arms under his and resting my hands on his shoulders. He pulled me close and I listened to his heartbeat.  
  
"No, you have nothing to be sorry for. It wasn't you...not you at all." I said, just wishing that he could comfort me forever.  
  
"Shh...you're alright...you're with me now...it'll be okay..." he soothed.  
  
I closed my eyes and imagined that it was, that it really was alright. But Nick had no idea. Sure, I had told him of Catherine, of the Kirkwood case, of my job doubts. But of my men problems he knew nothing.  
  
And I mean nothing.  
  
- Nick's Point Of View -  
  
I held Sara near to me, smelling her sweet shampoo and relishing in her touch. She still had on my sweatshirt, and my hand touched her bare skin as it was pulled involuntarily up. My touch made her jump slightly, and she tightened her grip around me. I sighed, feeling so sorry for her. She must be so scared.  
  
Little did I know...  
  
Later, as I reflect on what happened next, I can't believe I was so stupid. She had been so hurt. So badly injured all this time, and I had no idea. I kick myself for not noticing sooner, for not being a better friend. But there it was, and I was about to discover it.  
  
Sara released me, and I wished I could hold her again. She checked the watch that remained on her wrist.  
  
"C'mon, time to get up." She stated, sitting up on the couch.  
  
"No..." I whined, "Five more minutes." I closed my eyes, pretending to be asleep. A minute later, without warning, I felt a warm, tender pair of lips meet my own. When they pulled away, I opened my eyes to see Sara bending over me. I caught her eye, but she bit her lip and looked away, wondering what she had done.  
  
I smiled, sitting up to face her, and tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear. My hand lingered on her face when our eyes met, and I caressed her cheek gently. She leaned into me, resting her head on my chest.  
  
"Thanks Nick. Thanks for everything." she said sincerely.  
  
I kissed her forehead and gave her a quick squeeze.  
  
"Anytime." I answered.  
  
We released each other, content with what had just happened. Sara stood up and stretched, reaching her arms skyward. This pulled my sweatshirt up again. I was slightly mesmerized by her beauty and bare skin until something caught my eye. A black and blue scar on her stomach.  
  
Not that that is unusual I suppose, but I got this really, really sick feeling in the pit of my stomach and I knew that that bruise wasn't due to a fall or an accident.  
  
"Sara..." I said, reaching for her. She gave me a quizzical look, and I waved for her to come over to me. She took my outstretched hand, and I looked her in the eye. I was still sitting on the couch and she was standing in front of me. I pulled up the sweatshirt where I had seen the bruise, and yet again, there it was.  
  
I only caught a glimpse of it though. Sara released my hand, yanked down the sweatshirt and stormed away. She ran into my room, slamming the door behind her.  
  
I was left dumbfounded, but I figured she needed some time. I started to think about why she would storm off like that. I came up with plenty of reasons, but they all seemed completely irrational. That left me with two possibilities. Either 1) she didn't appreciate me pulling up her shirt, thought that I was making a move on her in an inappropriate way, and wasn't ready for that, or 2) my assumptions were correct, that bruise was inflicted by someone.  
  
All I can say is, I hope its number 1.  
  
LATER...  
  
I waited a good 5 minutes before I treaded slowly towards my room. I could hear Sara crying, and it hit me that she wouldn't cry if she thought I was coming on to her like that. My stomach plummeted, and I knew someone had hurt her. I took a deep breath, and opened the door.  
  
Sara was sitting on my bed, her knees in front of her. She looked up at me as I entered the room. Her knees dropped to the floor slowly as she stared at me, eyeliner and mascara trickling down her face.  
  
"Sara, I am so-"  
  
Then, all the sudden, she jumped up and ran to me, throwing her arms around my neck and clinging to me. I wrapped my arms around her waist as I felt sobs wrack her body. I put one hand on her head, quieting her and telling her it would be alright.  
  
She quieted down after awhile, still clinging tightly to me though. I stroked her back, soothing her. She relaxed, not clutching my neck so tightly. After I felt her take a deep breath, I knew there would never be a better time to speak.  
  
"Sara, I am so sorry if you thought I was coming on to you in an inappropriate way. I didn't mean for that at all, I would never violate you like that without talking to you about it first. You know me better." I said carefully, and she took her head from my chest and looked me in the eye.  
  
"I know you wouldn't Nick. That's not the kind of person you are, to just go and do something like that, to put our friendship on the line. I know you way better than that." She said with a weak smile. I kissed her forehead gently, and she ran her hands down my chest and back up.  
  
"Then someone hurt you. Please tell me." I pleaded, and she gave me an uncertain look. I waited, giving her some time, my thumb caressing the small of her back. She bit her lip, but made up her mind and released it.  
  
"Alright." Was all she said. She stepped out of my embrace. She turned around and pulled off the sweatshirt, leaving her in only her bra. What met my eyes next horrified me.  
  
The little bruise on her front was apparently only the beginning. She had ten little marks on her back and two welts on her sides.  
  
I knew what those were. I walked in front of her, watching her eyes tear up. I stretched out my hands, waiting to see if she would allow me to touch her. She nodded her head, and I took a step towards her. We were very close, our chests touched. I placed my hands on her bare sides, aligning with the bruises. She let out a choked sob.  
  
They were handprints.  
  
She shivered and two more sobs escaped her. I stroked her back for one moment, silently reassuring her. She squeezed my upper arm, and I backed up to look in her eyes. She nodded, and I knew she just needed some support. But as I was about to look at her back again, the bruise on her stomach caught my eye. There were two, and they were pretty big. I ran my hands over them, feeling the slight bulge. Sara squeezed my shoulder and sucked in air as I made a fist and gently touched it to the bruises.  
  
Perfect match.  
  
Then I saw something that I hope I never see again. Right between her breasts, there was a medium sized red mark. Like she had been pinched, or someone had sucked on the skin for quite a long time. I know I felt a tear roll down my cheek as I touched the scar tentatively.  
  
Sara wiped the tear away gently, taking one of my hands and giving it a gentle squeeze. I pulled her into a hug, trying to take away her pain. Tears streamed freely down my face as I held tightly onto her. My finger touched the tip of her pants, and it dawned on me that she must have more bruises. I didn't even want to think about the ones she probably had streaked down her legs, and over her butt. I almost made myself sick thinking where else she might have bruises.  
  
I held her tighter, letting her get it all out. When I realized she still was missing her top, I released her and bent down to pick it up. I gave it to her and looked away, not being able to bear the sight of her.  
  
When she had slipped it over her head, her hand came to my chin, turning my eyes to meet hers. She gave me a weak smile.  
  
"There are more bruises aren't there?" I asked, wishing I hadn't, for now I had to hear the answer.  
  
She nodded sadly, and I clasped my hands in hers. She leaned in and rested her head against my chest. I breathed deeply in and out, and she let go of one of my hands to trace my chest. I held her waist, pulling her into me, hoping my hand wasn't right where the bruises were. I let my hand slip down a little, and she didn't seem to mind.  
  
I could have sworn I caught a smile.  
  
- Sara's Point Of View -  
  
Well, nice one Sidle. Tell him everything why don't you. My brain was yelling at me, but my heart seemed to be applauding. Somehow, I felt relieved that someone else knew.  
  
And I don't think I could have picked a better person to tell.  
  
I felt Nick's hand slide down and touch my butt, and it made me smile. I realized something was growing between Nick and I, and I didn't know what to think. For one, I didn't know if it was just the fact that I was so hurt was the reason for his kindness, or if he really felt something. But, that didn't seem realistic due to the fact that he had kissed me, and seen me without a shirt.  
  
Then there was the whole work side of it. I mean, if we ended up breaking up, would things be so tense at work that one of us had to quit? On the complete other side, if we did stick it out and eventually, and I do mean eventually, got married, are we even aloud to work the same shift?  
  
But I loved it. I loved how Nick made me feel, so safe and calm and warm. I loved the amount of desire that rose up in the pit of my stomach each time I rested in his arms or kissed him.  
  
I loved Nick.  
  
Some people might call that irrational, but I had known Nick for four years now, and I've always loved him as a friend, just like I love Warrick and Catherine and yes...even Grissom. So, even though it caught me off guard, I guess it was inevitable for us to develop more than friendly feelings for each other.  
  
"Sara?" Nick called quietly, now caressing my back and bottom.  
  
"Yes?" I answered back.  
  
He took a deep breath before he spoke, and I knew his question before he even asked.  
  
"Who did this to you?" He said it very slow, and I bit my lip. It's a nervous habit.  
  
He hugged me tight for a long minute, encouraging me to tell him, but reassuring me he was there at the same time. I drew a breath in and told him.  
  
"Hank."  
  
I heard a slight growl emit from him and he muttered under his breath.  
  
"Fucking bastard..."  
  
I let him digest this for a moment, and was about to speak, but he beat me to it.  
  
"I thought you said you never...you know...went that far with him..." he said, sounding slightly hurt.  
  
"I didn't. I got caught up in the moment, and we almost did, but the bruises on my hips and breasts were the first injuries, and after that I backed off." I said solemnly, like this had no effect on me.  
  
But Nick saw right through it.  
  
"What about the others then?" he asked gently, wanting to know more, but not pressing the issue.  
  
"Well, after the first two, I tried to get away from him, and I eventually succeeded in locking myself in the bathroom. But not without a few hits from him first. I waited in the bathroom until he left..." I said quietly, and instantly I felt a wet spot on the top of my head. Nick avoided my eye as he pulled me towards his bed. We sat opposite of each other, and I brought a hand up and caressed his face, wiping away his tears.  
  
"Oh my God Sara...how could this here..." he gestured, and I did, sobs escaping me. He sat on the bed; his legs stretched apart just a little. I sat with my chest to his, crossing my legs behind his back. I snaked my arms around his neck as I felt his go around my lower waist.  
  
We just lay in each other's arms, comforting one another. One of my hands played through his hair, stroking his head as my other dipped into the top of his shirt to trail my nails across his upper back. His hand dipped down low onto my butt, caressing it. The other dipped under the sweatshirt, running across my skin. As I rested my head on his shoulder, I felt him plant a kiss on my cheek and smiled. This is how life is meant to be.  
  
And maybe, just maybe, this is how love is meant to be.  
  
- Nick's Point Of View -  
  
I could absolutely not believe what Sara had just told me. Hank had beaten her as she tried to flee from his evil grasp? It sounded like one of the cases I work.  
  
But Sara is not a case.  
  
But, I did feel better know that I knew. It was nice to know that Sara trusted me enough to tell me her darkest secret. I didn't really know for sure what was happening between Sara and myself, but the desire I feel for her every time she smiles at me is enough to know that I'm having some romantic feelings for her. And the protectiveness I feel right now is enough to tell me she'll be around a mighty long time.  
  
She leans back in my arms, and we wipe away each other's tears. I smile weakly at her, not believing what she must've gone through. She squeezes my shoulders for support.  
  
"I don't think I've ever cried so much in my life." I say truthfully, but she looks away.  
  
"I have." She adds, and I don't doubt it. I squeeze her around the waist.  
  
"I'm sorry Sara, I know I should be the strong one here but...I can't imagine something like that happening to you. You're Sara...my Sara...and when you get hurt, I should be able to comfort you...like a real man. I'm sorry, that sounds stupid..." I say, loosing track of what I'm saying.  
  
But her hand comes up to my chin, forcing me to look at her. She offers a smile.  
  
"Nick, nothing is more manly than being able to cry. I have never met someone who has been so supportive of me as you just were." She says, and we smile at each other.  
  
"C'mere Sar..." I say, and she enters my arms once again. One hand grasps hers, and we play around, caressing and squeezing and intertwining with the other person's hand. She slides her other arm under my shirt, holding me firmly around my waist. My hand travels low on her waist and butt, tracing figure eights and swirls over both.  
  
"Nick? Can I ask you something?" Sara asked me, with such an innocent tone, I couldn't imagine saying no.  
  
"Shoot." I say like true Texan.  
  
She pauses for a minute, squeezes my hand, and asks.  
  
"You know when I woke up this morning, how you told me it would be alright, that I was with you now?" she asked, and I had no idea where this was going.  
  
"Yeah...I remember..." faintly recalling it, amazed that she could.  
  
"Well, am I? Am I with you now?" she asked, ending on a hopeful note. I smiled at her, and even though she couldn't see it, I know she felt it. I squeezed her hand and around the waist.  
  
"You sure are." I said with sincerity. She released my hand and squeezed my neck tightly. I wrapped my arms around her back, giving her a quick squeeze. She backed away from my embrace for a moment, and I caught her eye. They held desire, but I waited a moment before I made a move. Tucking a stray hair behind her ear, my eyes silently asked her if this was what she wanted.  
  
She nods before capturing my lips. We kiss gently for a log time, not pushing it, taking it nice and slow. She giggles when my hands slide down to cup her butt, and she opens her mouth, willing my tongue inside. We explore each other's mouths for the first time, enjoying the sensation. The kiss breaks off as the need for air becomes to great, and she leans her head against my chest. Throwing me a wicked smile, she slides her hands under the back of my shirt, arousing me instantly. But it settles as she does, nestling into me. I kiss her forehead gently, and whisper something that makes her smile.  
  
"I love you Sara."  
  
"I love you Nick."  
  
Enveloping her in my arms, I hold her close.  
  
That's how I always want her.  
  
Close. 


End file.
